Top Reasons to Mediate

July 5, 2024

Top Reasons to Mediate

When facing the difficult process of divorce, many couples find that mediation provides a better path forward compared to traditional litigation. Mediation allows you to privately work through the terms of your divorce with your spouse outside of court, guided by a neutral third-party mediator. Litigation can be expensive, combative, and leave major decisions up to a judge. 

Key advantages of the mediation process include:


  1. Confidentiality - Unlike public court proceedings, mediation takes place in a private setting, allowing parties to candidly discuss sensitive personal matters like finances, child custody, and intimate relationship details outside of the public eye. This confidentiality protects families' privacy.
  2. Efficiency - Divorce mediation generally happens much faster than litigation. You're able to work through issues based on your schedule, rather than the court docket, and finalize a settlement far sooner. 
  3. Cost Savings - With mediation, parties avoid the steep costs of each hiring a divorce attorney for repeated court appearances over an extended period. A single mediator's fees are substantially less expensive, especially if the couple can reach an uncontested agreement. If both parties decide to bring an attorney to mediation, initially the cost is greater initially as you are paying three professionals, but parties generally reach an agreement faster which can decrease the overall cost.
  4. Greater Adherence to Agreements - When you've actively participated in crafting your divorce settlement, you're more invested in upholding the agreed-upon terms moving forward. Agreements reached through compromise tend to stick better than orders imposed by a judge.
  5. Creative Solutions - Judges are bound by laws that can be rigid when resolving divorce issues like asset division and child custody arrangements. Mediation allows you and your spouse more flexibility to develop customized solutions tailored to your unique situation.
  6. Parties Retain Control - In litigation, a judge who doesn't truly know the details of your circumstances makes major decisions about your divorce. With mediation, you and your spouse retain control over the outcome through negotiation and compromise.
  7. Better Communication - The mediation process itself helps foster more productive communication between divorcing spouses. With the mediator's guidance, you'll develop skills for conflict resolution and constructive dialogue - something that's invaluable when co-parenting.


For couples seeking an amicable exit from their marriage, divorce mediation presents a less costly, less combative, and more personalized means of effectuating the dissolution while protecting privacy and promoting healthy post-divorce family dynamics

September 29, 2025
Addressing Step-Parents, New Partners, and Co-Parenting Structures
August 23, 2025
Tips, Legal Considerations, and Co‑Parenting Guidance
July 17, 2025
Co-Parenting Tips for the School Year
April 26, 2025
If you're considering divorce in Hawaii, you’re likely navigating one of the most emotional and complex transitions of your life. You may be imagining long court battles, high legal fees, and months (or even years) of stress. But there’s another option— mediation —and it might be a better fit for your family, your finances, and your future. 1. Mediation is Less Expensive Than Court Legal fees can add up fast in a contested divorce. Between attorney retainers, filing fees, and court costs, traditional divorce can easily cost tens of thousands of dollars. Mediation, on the other hand, typically involves fewer billable hours and shared costs, making it a more affordable path forward. 2. It’s Quicker and More Flexible Court schedules can drag the divorce process out for months. Mediation sessions are scheduled at your convenience and often resolve issues much faster—sometimes in just a few sessions. It can be done either online or in person, giving you the flexibility to stay comfortable in your own space. You set the pace, not the court docket. 3. You Stay in Control In court, a judge makes the final decisions about your property, your finances, and your children. In mediation, you and your spouse work collaboratively with a neutral mediator to come to mutually agreeable solutions. This can feel more empowering and less adversarial. 4. It’s Private and Confidential Court proceedings are public record. Mediation, by contrast, is confidential. Sensitive family matters—like parenting concerns or financial struggles—stay private and are handled with discretion and compassion.  5. It’s Better for Co-Parenting If you’re raising children together, your relationship with your ex doesn’t end after the divorce is finalized. Mediation fosters communication and cooperation, which can lay the foundation for healthier co-parenting. Children benefit when parents can work together respectfully—even after separation. 6. It Honors Hawaii’s Cultural Values At Family Mediation Hawaii, we recognize the importance of aloha, ohana, and community. Mediation allows families to navigate change with respect and dignity, guided by culturally aware mediators who understand the local landscape. Is Mediation Right for You? If you and your spouse are willing to sit down with a neutral third party to discuss your options, mediation could be a great fit. Even in high-conflict situations, mediation can provide a calmer space to work through tough topics. 📅 Ready to explore your options? Fill out this intake form for a free consultation with Family Mediation Hawaii today. Let’s find a peaceful path forward—together.
March 28, 2025
Selecting a Mediator: Key Considerations for Success
By Katie Bennett December 4, 2024
A Mediator's Perspective on Holiday Co-Parenting
October 18, 2024
Surviving Divorce: From Scary Story to Success Story Like a Halloween tale that starts with fog rolling in and shadows lengthening, divorce can cast an eerie pall over your once-familiar life. The financial uncertainties, changing relationships, and unfamiliar terrain ahead might feel as daunting as a dark forest. But unlike those spooky stories, this one leads not to terror but to transformation. Let's turn on the lights and look at how to navigate these changes with confidence. Understanding Alimony Financial obligations like alimony can significantly impact your budget. Rather than viewing it as a burden, treat it as part of your new financial reality that requires strategic planning. Use this transition to review your spending, develop a sustainable budget, and possibly explore additional income sources. Many people find that post-divorce financial planning helps them develop stronger money management skills. Maintaining Parent-Child Relationships Perhaps the most significant challenge of divorce is adapting to spending less time with your children. While the adjustment is difficult, you can maintain strong connections through intentional effort. Regular video calls, shared activities, and consistent communication help preserve your bond. Many parents find that focused, quality time can be more meaningful than quantity alone. Creating a New Home Leaving a shared home often feels like a setback, but it's also an opportunity to create a space that supports your next chapter. Whether you're downsizing or relocating, focus on making your new place functional and comfortable. Consider this move a chance to declutter, reorganize, and design a space that works for your new lifestyle. Moving Forward Divorce marks a significant life transition, but it doesn't define your future. Focus on practical steps: building a support network, maintaining professional stability, and taking care of your physical and mental health. Many people discover unexpected strengths and opportunities for personal growth during this process. Conclusion While divorce brings undeniable challenges, approaching them pragmatically can help you navigate this transition successfully. Focus on what you can control: your finances, your relationships, and your personal growth. With time and attention to these key areas, you can turn this challenging chapter into a story of resilience and renewal.
September 3, 2024
Supporting Your Children Through the Storm
August 13, 2024
Save Money with Mediation
By Katie Bennett April 19, 2023
See the article: